Hives Recurrence Scare - and Confessions of Hives Anxiety

Yesterday, I had a "scare" that my hives were returning. I had what looked like a hive on my neck, and also had a few red blotches on my left palm (looked exactly like the red blotches that appeared before this whole thing started; see my post here.). I started to get very anxious, which made my skin get very flushed and a little bit rashy. A few hours later, the blotches on my left palm were completely gone -- the blotches I had last summer were there 24/7 for several days before the hives kicked in. I also noticed that the "hive" on my neck looked like it could be a bug bite or something else. In fact, 24 hours later, it is still there but lighter; hives usually are gone after 8 hours at their longest life, from what I have experienced. This has caused me to reflect on my anxiety that surrounds the dreaded hives. Why do I fear them so much? Why do I dread the thought of them appearing? As my husband says, "They are just hives, they are not going to hurt you." I break it down into a few things:

• Loss of control -- As a type-A person, I am someone who thrives on figuring out solutions to problems and showing how I can excel in that capacity. This has caused me to spend countless hours seeing specialists, getting tests and labwork done, trying different drugs, and researching exhaustively to come up with the solution. So far, there have been no solutions, despite my best efforts. This is very frustrating to someone who is wired like me, "why can't I figure this out!!" It has been humbling and frustrating, and I don't like it one bit! (imagine a pouty face here.)
• Inhibits my lifestyle -- Some may argue that this has more to do with my attitude about the hives, but really it isn't. On a 90-degree humid day, I need to stay inside because the heat and sweating will lead to a significant outbreak, which leads to massive itchiness and feeling generally miserable. This prevents me from staying out too long in the summer to enjoy summer activities in the heat. It means that I can't wear things that show skin where hives are spotting me (okay well, I CAN wear them, but who would want to?). It means traveling to warm, tropical places for vaction is likely a bad idea. I am supposed to travel for my job, and I have found reasons to not do this as much. It also means that sweaty exercise is off the table too.
• Raises questions about my health -- Because I know I have an autoimmune issue (Hashimoto's), it makes me wonder if there is something "more serious" happening under the covers that is not yet understood by the medical community. It whispers to me, and sometimes screams at me, that something is wrong with me compared to others who aren't afflicted with this. It makes me feel "wrong" and broken.
• Creates confusion -- I don't know where to turn to for help. Dermatologist or Allergist? Allergist or Endocrinologist? Or maybe a Naturopath? Or Holistic doctor? Should I experiment with my diet? Is it my medications? I have tried pretty much all of the above, and it feels like you are on a merry-go-round visiting each repeatedly for help and support and possible new insights. And you are also thinking of yet new ideas to pursue or new things to look into.
• Unpredictability -- Aside from predicting that high heat and sweating will trigger them, you never know what you are going to get each day. Will it be one? None? Several? Where will they be, on my face? Hands? Neck? Will they fade fast, or will they multiply throughout the day? Should I make dinner plans? Travel plans? I have gone sometimes several weeks with none, thinking that they are gone, then they magically appear again one day. I have gone 4.5 months now with none (maybe), and I am worrying they are going to return any day now.

So I continue to work on my own anxiety issues related to the hives, and this is an ongoing battle and lots of work still to do there. I would love to hear if anyone else can relate, and how they have learned to cope!